Ship In A Bottle (Spongebob Squarepants Fanfiction)
Ship In A Bottle Synopsis - Mr.Krabs, Spongebob, Squidward & Patrick are hired by Grandpa Redbeard to get his ship in a bottle back from rival pirates. Characters Squidward Tentacles Spongebob Squarepants Patrick Star Eugene H. Krabs Grandpa Redbeard Whitebeard Pirates Captain Angelica Harold Squarepants (mentioned) Herb Star (mentioned) The Flying Dutchman (mentioned) The Story The story begins at The Krusty Krab. Squidward sits at his post drinking some coffee when Spongebob suddenly pops up. SPONGEBOB: HEY SQUIDWARD!!! SQUIDWARD: AAAAH! Squidward accidentally spills his coffee all over his shirt. SQUIDWARD: UGHH! Agh! Spongebob! Why must you always pain me every ten minutes?! SPONGEBOB: 11 to be exact. SQUIDWARD: WHAT DO YOU WANT?! SPONGEBOB: I just wanted to see if you think Patrick's breath smells bad. Patrick walks up to Squidward. PATRICK: Hey Squidward! Squidward smells a breath more rancid than his own cottage cheese. SQUIDWARD: Oh barnacles that is not right! Suddenly, Mr.Krabs rushes up in an excited fashion. MR.KRABS: Attention all Krusty Krab Shipmates! Front & Center to the Parking Lot! That includes you too pink purloiner! PATRICK: Pink Purloiner? Who's the pink purloiner?! Are you the pink purloiner Squidward?! SQUIDWARD(sarcastically): Yes I so am. PATRICK: I knew it! SQUIDWARD: Idiot MR.KRABS: Just everybody out to the parking lot ASAP! Mr.Krabs & the others head out to the parking lot. Spongebob notices a rusty old bus. SPONGEBOB: Why do you have that rusty old bus Mr.K? MR.KRABS: Board it and I will tell ye why! Spongebob & Mr.Krabs board the bus followed by Squidward & Patrick. SQUIDWARD: I hate Mr.Krabs’ ideas. All have finally boarded and after gulping down some kelp juice, Mr.Krabs finally answers. MR.KRABS: Now the reason why we have boarded this bus is for a very special occasion! SPONGEBOB: Ooh! Ooh! Are we going to Jellyfish Legends?! MR.KRABS: No! PATRICK: Ooh! Ooh! Are we going on an extreme rock climbing adventure over the crazy Avalanchan Mountains on a time limit of 50 seconds in pink polka dotted undies?! MR.KRABS: No! SQUIDWARD: Are we going home? MR.KRABS: Absolutely not! Man you guys have weird pastimes. Anyways, all of ye are wrong! We are going to go see my Grandpa Redbeard! SPONGEBOB: YAY! PIRATES! PATRICK: Robot Pirate Adventure! SQUIDWARD: I’ll pass. MR.KRABS: Eh no you’re not, now buckle up boys, we got a road ahead! Mr.Krabs gets into the driver's seat and all are on the way. The scene cuts to the rusty old bus arriving & breaking down right at a pier. The bus leaks black smoke. The characters all exit. SQUIDWARD: Aggh! Call a mechanic! PATRICK: My Dad's a mechanic! SPONGEBOB: Pat, my Dad's the mechanic, yours works in a toy factory. PATRICK: Oh yeah! He makes such amazing Christmas Presents for me! MR.KRABS: Ahem anyways, we won’t need any mechanical engineers! We have arrived! Here he comes now! Grandpa Redbeard approaches The Krusty Krew. REDBEARD: Thar they blow! It's good to see you again Eugene! MR.KRABS: Right back at you Grandpa! Haha! SQUIDWARD: Wait, I just realized something, Mr.Krabs is in his 70's so……… how old are you Mr.Redbeard? REDBEARD: I’m 127, why you ask matey? SQUIDWARD: Just saying. REDBEARD: Arrghh, anyways, it's also good to see ye again Sponge Lad & Pink One. SPONGEBOB: Chao! PATRICK: What does pink one mean? REDBEARD: Oh I remember, you two are the comedians, my grandson is the money making economist & the Squid One is the Bore. SQUIDWARD: I’m not boring! Oh wait, yes I am. MR.KRABS: Anyhow, let's set sail! REDBEARD: I’m afraid I can’t do that Eugene. MR.KRABS: Why not? REDBEARD: A precious artifact was stolen off me today. SPONGEBOB: And what would that be? REDBEARD: Good question Sponge kid, this artifact be me ship in a bottle! PATRICK: Ship in a bottle? But your ship is right in front of us, its in no bottle! REDBEARD: Harharhar! That is the candid spirit! But sadly it is not enough to regenerate me love of the fine blue. And I’m not talking about me big boat. MR.KRABS: Well who stole your ship in a bottle, that precious loot has been in our family for ages! Since the Middle Ages! REDBEARD: It be me rivals! The Whitebeards! SQUIDWARD: Whitebeards? REDBEARD: Yes the Whitebeards! The scum of the sea! Worse than ye grandmother's & me wife's toenails Eugene! MR.KRABS & SPONGEBOB: Ughhh!! REDBEARD: Ughhh indeed, but that woman was sure a lassie! MR.KRABS: Well don’t fret Grandpa! We will get ye precious treasure back from these scoundrels! And me crew will help! SPONGEBOB: YES! PIRATE ADVENTURE! PATRICK: Pirate! Pirate! Pirate! SQUIDWARD: Eh, I’ll pass. MR.KRABS: Eh no you won’t, and losing ye job makes no bills or home for you lad! SQUIDWARD: Grrrr!! REDBEARD: Excellent enthusiasm boys! But be aware! These antagonists are so evil that they make even The Flying Dutchman himself look like a little lad! PATRICK: What's a lad? SQUIDWARD: You disappoint me Patrick. SPONGEBOB: Don’t worry! These so-called Whitebeards won’t be any issue ay Eugene? MR.KRABS: Yea, I guess. SQUIDWARD: How are we even getting to the Whitebeards anyways? REDBEARD: Board me big boat and ye question will be solved! Spongebob, Patrick, Squidward, Mr.Krabs & Redbeard board the big ship. SPONGEBOB: Okay so now what? REDBEARD: Get in the cannons! SQUIDWARD: Cacacacaca...cannons?! MR.KRABS: Come on Mr.Squidward! Mr.Krabs stuffs his crew into a cannon and then seals them & himself in. Redbeard lights the fuse. SQUIDWARD: WAIT I DIDN’T SIGN UP FOR THIS! PATRICK: Wait, there's a permission slip to go along with this? I forgot to bring a pencil! The cannon explodes sending all four protagonists screaming for their lives across the deep blue. REDBEARD(yelling): Make sure to get the bottle quickly! After more screaming, Spongebob & Patrick land safely on cushioned lifeboats. Squidward lands face first into a pole & Mr.Krabs is thrown into a box of bowling pins. SQUIDWARD: Ow.. Ow… and Ow. MR.KRABS: Oh quit ye blubberin! SPONGEBOB: YES! BECAUSE, THAT WAS SO MUCH FUN!! PATRICK: I vote for a second round! SQUIDWARD: I vote against! MR.KRABS: Will you three clowns stifle?! Errgh! Let's just go and steal back what belongs to me Granddaddy and then we split! Got it?! SPONGEBOB: With an army of deadly white bearded pirates guarding the door? MR.KRABS: Yes! Mr.Krabs then turns around, sees an angry army of Whitebeards & then realizes what he just said. MR.KRABS: Oh come on! WHITEBEARD PIRATE: Sorcerers! SPONGEBOB: No! No! No! We’re not sorcerers! PATRICK: We’re going to steal a ship in a bottle that you stole from Mr.Krabs’ sweaty grandfather! Even though his ship is not in a bottle & we just came from it! SPONGEBOB, SQUIDWARD & MR.KRABS: PATRICK!!!!!!! Another old looking pirate crab like Redbeard but has a red beard instead of Redbeard's white one, scampers up & menacingly eyes the protagonists. CAPTAIN: What do we have here? SPONGEBOB: We are just um… enjoying the nice weather! CAPTAIN: It's cloudy & 26 degrees out. PATRICK: Did you ever hear about being cold blooded? I think not! CAPTAIN: Don’t get smart with me conehead baby! Ye are messing with the wrong pirate! Notorious, feared, leader of the seven seas! Captain!.......... Angelica. Spongebob, Patrick, Squidward & Mr.Krabs look at each other in confusion for a minute before breaking out in laughter & ecstasy. ANGELICA: What are ye chirping on about?! SQUIDWARD: Your name is Angelica?! MR.KRABS: That's a girl's name! PATRICK: And you are a boy! SPONGEBOB: Hahahaha! Oh boy, only in 2018 can we get out of place names! ANGELICA: Angelica is not a girl's name! SQUIDWARD: Yeah it is! ANGELICA: I’ll have ye know that my name was passed down generation after generation in me family! Since the 1600s to be exact! MR.KRABS: And I think you are good enough to be the last of the kin! The four cry with laughter again. Steam angrily blows out of Captain Angelica's nose. He then shoots a cannonball into the goo to interrupt the laughter. ANGELICA: SILENCE!!!! SQUIDWARD: Why? Is silence the #1 rule of your girl's club? SPONGEBOB: Hahaaha! ANGELICA: This is me vessel! And I will not stand for these taunts any further! PATRICK: Wow, you should look into brushing your teeth! I haven’t brushed mine in 20 years and they still smell a lot better than yours! ANGELICA: THAT IS IT! To the brig with ya! Some Whitebeard Pirates bonk Patrick on the head with a club & throw him into the brig. SPONGEBOB: PATRICK!! MR.KRABS: Angelica! Hehehe! Uh anyways, let that pink moron go now! ANGELICA: Not happening! This salty old sea captain has had enough of ye antagonism! Crew! Apprehend these sorcerers! The pirate crew prepare to attack Spongebob, Squidward & Mr.Krabs. MR.KRABS: Follow me! SPONGEBOB: Yikes! SQUIDWARD: Gangway! The three try to find the ship in a bottle, then the key to free Patrick & then a lifeboat to use to escape the ship & get back to Redbeard. ANGELICA: After them ye salty dingbats! The Whitebeards give chase. Spongebob & Mr.Krabs make it to Angelica's office. MR.KRABS: Come on boy! The ship in a bottle has to be here somewhere! SPONGEBOB: WAIT! WHERE’S SQUIDWARD?! Squidward is shown on the other side of the room enjoying the perfumes of Angelica's colognes. i SQUIDWARD: Hey! He may have a girl's name but he sure knows how to be stylish! Angelica & the other pirates viciously bang on the doors and windows to force entry. They even use their swords to try and also smash the glass. SPONGEBOB: We’re doomed! We’re so doomed! SQUIDWARD: I didn’t even get to rehearse “Mary Had A Little Seahorse” in G Major yet! MR.KRABS: Can it you two! We’ll get out of this! Find that bottle! Free Patrick! And get on out of here! SQUIDWARD: Wait is that the bottle? Mr.Krabs looks to see a ship in a bottle on Angelica's desk in front of a crossword puzzle, a picture of Angelica himself & in front of a can of Altoids. MR.KRABS: Bingo! On the money money money! Harharhar! Mr.Krabs pockets the treasure angering Angelica outside. SPONGEBOB: Now how do we SCRAM?! One window smashes & the pirates begin climbing in. SPONGEBOB: We’re so done! Mr.Krabs pries open a closet door, takes out some hazmat suits & chemical acids. MR.KRABS: No! They are done me boyo! SQUIDWARD: Wait why does a pirate ship have chemicals on it? MR.KRABS: Don’t jinx the illogic! The Whitebeards are about to press in further but then witness the protagonists enter their Hazmats & prepare to spray the acids. WHITEBEARD PIRATE: Noooooo! The pirates are sprayed away by all and any burning chemicals you can imagine. As some pirates burn & wither away while others jump overboard clinging their eyeballs in pain, Angelica on the other hand puts on his own Hazmat suit & is able to steal back the ship in a bottle. ANGELICA: Hoorah! Angelica prepares to abandon ship & get away with the treasure. He escapes on a lifeboat after dumping his hazmat into the goo before Spongebob, Squidward & Mr.Krabs could catch him. SPONGEBOB: Barnacles! We’re too late! PATRICK: Think again my yellow sidekick! Patrick uses his immense amount of strength to bust himself out of the brig & make it back up on deck. SPONGEBOB: PATRICK! YOU’RE FREE! PATRICK: Yeah! You sure cannot put a price tag on me! MR.KRABS: Phooey! SQUIDWARD: Okay well uh, Angelica is getting away & you bozos are causing it!! PATRICK: Oh yeah the mangirl! Patrick stations on the plank & eyes Angelica who eyes him back. ANGELICA: What are ye going to do pink one?! I am in a lifeboat and you are not! Harharharhar! PATRICK: Pit attack! Patrick's lifts his armpits causing the hair underneath to extend & grab Angelica. ANGELICA: Oh sweet Dutchman's Ghost this is fowl! Angelica is thrust into Patrick's armpit & rubbed up & down. MR.KRABS: Give us the bottle back you snowflake! PATRICK: Or face! Armpit sweat! ANGELICA: Ahagahahagahhahahh!!! Okay okay! Here you go! Arrghh!! Angelica surrenders over the bottle which Mr.Krabs pockets. Patrick releases Angelica. SPONGEBOB: Shall we Patrick? PATRICK: Let's shall! Spongebob & Patrick push Angelica down into the brig & fill it with chemical acid. ANGELICA: Aaagagaghh!! Spongebob & the others successfully escape the ship through another lifeboat & breathe several sighs of relief. The scene cuts to Redbeard positioning his bottle back on its rightful mantle. REDBEARD: Excellent work me patsys! Seriously good job! That Angelica was getting to be a real pain in me hindquarters! SQUIDWARD: And he should look into changing his name since well, he is a boy. The five friends all laugh in unison. PATRICK: And he should brush his teeth! Spongebob, Squidward, Mr.Krabs & Redbeard all eye Patrick with weird looks on their faces. Category:SquidwardTentacles35